Review of Ninja Assassin
A travesty. An absolute travesty. It could have been a great movie about ninjas trying to adapt to modern times while staying true to their long-held code and traditions. Could almost have been a parable about the struggles of us here at the International Ninja Union. But instead, the movie takes a bitter ex-ninja named Raizo who failed his training and then slaughters an entire clan of hard-working ninja and turns him into the hero!
How dare they!
Now, there are some sympathetic characters in the movie:
- Ozuno, the kindly old ninja master who takes the young Raizo under his wing
- Takesh, his adopted brother, who helps train him, and protects him from those who would betray him–like the young girl who coddles him as a child and tries to seduce him away from the clan when they are teens
- even an attractive ninja who only wants help folding a sheet in the laundrymat
But they are all slaughtered in turn by the psychopathic and vengeful, Raizo. I truly hope no one falls for this anti-ninja propaganda. On a scale of 1 to 10, I give it a negative four billion.

